About last night: Tips for establishing regular routines

One way that I’m able to stay balanced is by having a regular morning and evening routine. In my experience, the evening routine is more of a challenge. It took more practice to find that than with my morning routine. Regardless, consistency at the beginning and end of the day helps me sleep better, wake up refreshed, and contributes to my overall satisfaction with life.

It began at dawn

The first time I tried to establish a regular routine was after I got my first full time job. I was teaching middle school in the United States and needed to clock in at 7am prompt. I was committed to having healthy habits while working a full time job so I created a seemingly foolproof morning routine.

5:00 - meditate or yoga

5:15 - walk the dog

5:40 - make and eat breakfast

6:15 - pack your bag

6:30 - leave for work 

Now this routine worked for about 2 weeks and after that, things started to get mixed up. Maybe I was enjoying my morning walk and lost track of time or maybe I didn’t feel like meditating or maybe I overslept. Whatever the reason, I couldn’t maintain this routine. I realized that part of the problem was that I wasn’t sleeping well through the night so I implemented an evening routine. 

My first attempt at an evening routine

My first attempt at an evening routine included all the stops. One difficult thing to manage is the fact that my evenings don’t look the same. In general, I think this is why I struggled the most with maintaining an evening routine. Some nights, I’d have dance practice until 21:00 and other nights, volleyball ended at 19:00. Occasionally, I’d have late nights at the school as well. The fact is, every night of my life is a little different. At the time, I read somewhere that it takes most people 20-30 minutes to fall asleep, so regardless of the night, I did try to be in bed by 9:30 to get enough sleep. 

Honestly, my first evening routine wasn’t organized at all. It was a complete mess. I read a million different articles and tried to incorporate evening tea, quiet music, night time yoga, candles, journaling, dimming the lights, and no screens after 8. Similar to my morning routine, I wasn’t able to maintain it. There was too much going on. 

Current Routine:

Morning	Evening
Movement and Mindfulness Movement : yoga, walk, hike, or swim Mindfulness : journal, paint, meditate, or read	Notice the sunset, wash my face, and quiet time in bed Quiet time : lay in silence, listen to music, write, or read

Characteristics of a good routine

• Simple

• Easy

• Flexible

• Supportive of the lifestyle you want to live

Though my life has changed substantially since my first attempt at a routine, I’ve found that keeping one continues to help me feel balanced. I figured out that the key to being able to maintain any routine is to make them simple, easy, flexible, and supportive of the lifestyle that I want to live. 

On being simple:

The first mistake I made with my routine was being rigid and over complicating it. I thought that adding a firm structure would somehow make me feel good. I thought that if I found the magic equation (yoga + meditation + evening tea = happy life!) I’d be able to solve all my problems. What I neglected to realize is that I am, in fact, not a robot who needs programming, but a human being who needs both organization and flow to stay healthy. Making something simple that is easy to do increases your chances of success and the ability to maintain without much effort. 

On being easy:

The second mistake I made was making things too difficult. Though I wanted to add yoga and meditation to my daily life, I was still a beginner who didn’t particularly enjoy doing either of these activities. I knew that I wanted to improve and use these tools, but in reality, they were hard! And doing them first thing in the morning only added to my frustration. Though it might be counter intuitive to plan for easy things, when it comes to my daily routine, I think this is absolutely essential. I say that because on the days I have energy, there is space to do more; meanwhile, on the days I don’t have energy, doing something easy is just enough to keep me doing it on a daily basis. 

On being flexible:

Another thing I realized over the years of modifying my routine is that flexibility is another essential. My morning routine has changed from being specific to broad in order to allow different options for different days. This week, for example, I went on multiple morning hikes with the dogs because I felt the desire to move; meanwhile, in the week before, I didn’t feel like leaving home and instead, did morning yoga or stretching every day. It’s very rare that I find myself wanting to do the same exact thing every day so when it comes to creating a daily routine, I vote for options and flexibility to be built into the routine. 

On being supportive of the lifestyle you want to live:

Okay, this might sound terrible, but when I was in my last year of high school, one part of my evening routine was having a rum and coke when I got off of work. My family home had been destroyed in a storm and in addition to attending school, I was working 2 jobs. Most nights, I’d get in around midnight and frequently would have a glass before bed. This was an evening routine, but it didn’t support the lifestyle that I wanted to live. Being aware of habits is crucial, especially the ones you do every day. For me, I prefer not to use alcohol as a tool to help me unwind and so this ritual was replaced. When it comes to considering what your daily routines might look like, take a step back and evaluate the big picture of the kind of life you want to live. 

Final Things to Consider

Finding a routine that works for you takes time and energy. I function well with a solid morning and evening routine. Do you think you would too? Or do you need a lunch routine? Or a routine for the times you wake up in the middle of the night and can’t fall back to sleep? 

When it comes to establishing routines, I found it helpful to have a period of experimentation before committing to any habits. Play with your routines and then reflect on how they feel before dedicating yourself to any particular practice. Also, while finding a routine, consider things that you do naturally. Simple tasks like watering the plants or petting the dog might help you start or finish your day with ease.

One final point that I learned about routines is that my needs and preferences change. My morning routine starts later in the winter because I wake up at sunrise (which changes). My needs also change based on different points of my menstrual cycle. Moving with your body and the flow of life is necessary to maintain balance and keep up with any routines. I’ve found that being strict was never helpful for the long term; but instead, I found that a healthy balance of structure and simplicity was the key to success for me.

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